This is different, and it does remind me a lil of Thom Yorkes solo work.... Like RunsWithBuff was saying you, you're not going for the acoustic sound here.
I myself dig techno, house, trance..I grew up on a lot of it...
I would like to hear this mixed differently..I'm not sure if the drums are to loud or just not sounding right to me... I see how you're trying to put the vocals in the background like another instrument.. but maybe just up a lilll bit... maybe its not the volume but i'd like to hear them more upfront if you know what I mean.. I dunno.... see what it sounds like, if it sounds like shi*.. then it wasn't my idea
If you were going to throw a chorus into this song it couldn't be a traditional chorus, as the song isn't traditional, it would need more of a techno/house hook... if ya knows what im a saying...maybe even have a chick do it... The lyrics are reallly abstract.. which is cool and I dig that.. but I think if you had a common chorus/hook it would really tie whole song together....and give something for people to identify with...
All in all I think this is great stuff....diggin it...
You have some great potential for original material...