the Writing Thespian

Post recordings you have made here and get feedback from the community. Songwriting topics would also reside here.

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Ranting Thespian
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the Writing Thespian

Unread post by Ranting Thespian » Sun Sep 14, 2003 1:23 pm

Alright, I finally posted up some songs. the first three are some of my good ones. I didn't put up my 2 best, for fear of them being ripped off. I am not saying you guys would, but someone who might accidentaly strole across your computer through a file share program, or a stranger who stubles onto these boards. When I get them copywrited, I will post them. But, these are 3 good ones. None of them are any of my depressing or sucide ones, though ;) .

The other two are covers. Michelle by the Beatles, no lyrics, just a finger picked solo guitar version of mine. Real Love was a song that John Lennon wrote in the 70s, but never made any albums. A short acoustic guitar version came up on the soundtrack to the documentry Imagine. Then the beatles used one of the Piano versions during their "reunion sessions". They first did Free As A Bird, an unfinished John Lennon song, then they did Real Love which wasn't as exciting for the band, because did finish the tune, but it still sounds great with the other 3 on it.


My Songs
http://www.angelfire.com/folk/singer-so ... janell.mp3
http://www.angelfire.com/folk/singer-so ... sk_for.mp3
http://www.angelfire.com/folk/singer-so ... e_moon.mp3

Covers
http://www.angelfire.com/folk/singer-so ... chelle.mp3
http://www.angelfire.com/folk/singer-so ... l_love.mp3
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Unread post by Appfro » Mon Sep 15, 2003 12:31 am

looking forward to listening when i get home

you should spread these out more, that's a lot to listen too in one sitting :D

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Unread post by chipper3344 » Mon Sep 15, 2003 2:39 am

i didnt listen to all of them but the ones i did sounded good. you sound alot like ian anderson from Jethro Tull!!!

GREG

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Unread post by rampaged.congt » Mon Sep 15, 2003 3:55 am

how can you get a song copywrited?
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fatjack
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Unread post by fatjack » Mon Sep 15, 2003 4:21 am

first off... overall, it was a good job on all your originals (i didn't listen to your covers yet)

but the progression were kinda of normal and really didn't stand out, but i did really like the progression on the first song that was listed. the playing on them was technically sound, kept a good tempo and not many mishit notes at all.

i think i've said this before, but your voice sounds a little creepy to me. the melodies are on key, but the way you emphasize certain syllables makes it sound like you are trying to tell a scary story.

and for your lyrics, i can't say i really like them, but i really dont care for the lyrics to almost any song. i think the fact that your lyrics didn't make me wretch are a good sign that other people will like them :wink:

and for the recording quality, it was good, but i would suggest getting a pop filter for your mic, there were a few hard p's and b's in the fist tune that clipped the mic

once again, good job... i give all of your originals a 7 out of 10
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Unread post by isaac » Mon Sep 15, 2003 4:24 am

what lyrics DO you like, fatjack? :P ;)

anyway, you already played a few of these for me before ranting. i approved muchly, though i'm with fatjack in the boat where i'm still trying to get used to your voice, but that's all right. better than my voice, but that might not be saying much. ;)
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fatjack
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Unread post by fatjack » Mon Sep 15, 2003 4:31 am

isaac wrote:what lyrics DO you like, fatjack?
anything that doesn't have the words "she" "her" "girl" "love" or anything else having to do with the beaten-to-death theme of love
I'm Josh: sometimes known as Steve

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Unread post by NoNotThat » Mon Sep 15, 2003 4:32 am

what about songs with "he" "him" "boy" or "shim"?

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Unread post by fatjack » Mon Sep 15, 2003 4:34 am

NoNotThat wrote:what about songs with "he" "him" "boy" or "shim"?
same principle...
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Unread post by Easy E » Mon Sep 15, 2003 6:28 am

yes, "shim" has been beaten to death
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Unread post by Ranting Thespian » Mon Sep 15, 2003 12:18 pm

Well, thanks. If you give me more feedback about things in the songs, or things you like about them, or the parts you didn't like, that would be much abliged. Also, none of the songs have any romatic influence. the first one is a situation between me and a friend. The second one is a song about basic love and the moon. I was looking at the moon a lot, and thought about writing a song that included the way i felt at the moment, the mood, and with the moon. Janell was a song I wrote for a friend of that name, who was going through pretty bad times recently. The two songs I think are my best, neither one is about anything close to what I posted. One is very politcal, and the other is about abuse.

And my voice scares you? lol. I don't see why it is scary.

Again, if you could give me more feedback, I would really appreciate it.
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Unread post by geekmug » Mon Sep 15, 2003 2:08 pm

I am not good with accents, but you sound like you have a heavy british accent. And, that is what people are finding "scary" .. no offense to you.. but it is distracting from the lyrics for me. So, I just listened to them all and don't really remember anything you said except how wierd you said "natural" one time. I know there are people who would like your voice.. you just happen to be of a forum of dave people who all hate any singing that doesn't sound like dave.

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Unread post by Bedurndurn » Mon Sep 15, 2003 2:32 pm

Your voice has a weird sorta androgynous quality to it. I kinda like All That I Ask For, but the falsetto you use in that one seems more awkward that when I've heard you use it in your other recordings. Musically speaking, I like Under the Moon, but Janell is odd. I find it "sorta catchy." It's nice, but the main verse rift feels like it needs more bass. Maybe fiddle with some different chords voicings? Slide on a lower string?

Anyway.. that's what I'd fiddle with, but they're your songs, and nobody's paying me to be a musician so feel free to ignore me :)

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Unread post by Bedurndurn » Mon Sep 15, 2003 2:36 pm

British?

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Ranting Thespian
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Unread post by Ranting Thespian » Mon Sep 15, 2003 3:24 pm

heavey british accent? Aww, you are so kind. I love England, and it's arts, comedy, ect.

I can do a good british accent, but that is my voice. I am not trying to sound british, I didn't even think I did. If you are wondering, though, I'm from Wisconsin. I am mostly English in my blood, too. I have French and even some native american in there.

But, my voice, that's it, I am just singing my natural voice. Also, Janell is played on electric, and it was a quick take, so I didn't adjust the levels on it.


What did you guys think of the covers? I love to play Real Love.
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