an original i wrote today

Matty Boom · Unread post by **Matty Boom** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 3:02 pm

here's an original i wrote in about an hour today, it just kinda came out of me so i figured i better record it...it's called 'don't give up on me'

here are the lyrics:

oh darlin think about the good days
oh darlin think about what we used to be
don't tell me it's not still there inside
whatever happened to you and me

don't give up on me
these cold days will pass
harsh wind and grey skies
it just can't last

i go through this world i don't see any colors
nothings as bright as that blonde in your hair
please just call me one more time
please just tell me that you still care

don't give up on me
these cold days will pass
harsh wind and grey skies
it just can't last

i remember
the last time i held you
i remember
begging to not let go
i remember
you driving away
i remember
i remember

you know i see you oh all the time
when i'm awake and and when i dream
please come back to me
i'll be all you ask me to be

don't give up on me
these cold days will pass
harsh wind and grey skies
it just can't last

so, let me know what you think...i'm still working on the voice thing, so let me know if i'm going in the right direction there and maybe tell me what you think of the song too...thanks a lot guys!

http://mmasarik.dmbtabs.com/dontgiveuponme.mp3

juineaux · Unread post by **juineaux** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 3:40 pm

Im downloading it right now(it might be a while 28.8 connection), but the lyrics sound great. I like this line alot:
"i go through this world i don't see any colors"

juineaux · Unread post by **juineaux** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 4:57 pm

The voice sounds great, and the song is good as well. The recording is lo-fi, but in a good way, very balanced and open sounding-

i-am-me · Unread post by **i-am-me** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 6:29 pm

I can hear both dave and jack johnson in there. haha. i lvoe seeing how people's influences come through in their originals

i like this quite a bit. your lyrics are awesome. and your voice is getting damn good.

my first instinct is to say that the guitar work is alittle repetitive with that rhythm, but it grew on me. ncely done matty.

Matty Boom · Unread post by **Matty Boom** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 6:37 pm

i-am-me wrote:I can hear both dave and jack johnson in there. haha. i lvoe seeing how people's influences come through in their originals

i like this quite a bit. your lyrics are awesome. and your voice is getting damn good.

my first instinct is to say that the guitar work is alittle repetitive with that rhythm, but it grew on me. ncely done matty.

what...i've never even heard of dave matthews or jack johnson

:lol:

thanks for the critique mikey!

mdel21 · Unread post by **mdel21** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 7:07 pm

I like it

mangold · Unread post by **mangold** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 9:02 pm

thats friggon awsome... tab maybe?

edit: i must be honset tho, im not a huge fan of your voice. it sounds good just not my style.

Matty Boom · Unread post by **Matty Boom** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 9:08 pm

praisedave wrote:thats friggon awsome... tab maybe?

edit: i must be honset tho, im not a huge fan of your voice. it sounds good just not my style.

care to be more specific about what you don't like?

mangold · Unread post by **mangold** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 9:16 pm

Matty Boom wrote:
praisedave wrote:thats friggon awsome... tab maybe?

edit: i must be honset tho, im not a huge fan of your voice. it sounds good just not my style.
care to be more specific about what you don't like?

about your voice? i think it sounds like you're tryin to hard and it sounds, to me, like your voice doesnt quite have the sustain to sing what you wrote. thats just personal preference tho. i love evrything else about the song. the guitar, the writing, the organization. its on my "having a good day" playlist.

Matty Boom · Unread post by **Matty Boom** » Thu Nov 11, 2004 9:23 pm

praisedave wrote:
Matty Boom wrote:
praisedave wrote:thats friggon awsome... tab maybe?

edit: i must be honset tho, im not a huge fan of your voice. it sounds good just not my style.
care to be more specific about what you don't like?
about your voice? i think it sounds like you're tryin to hard and it sounds, to me, like your voice doesnt quite have the sustain to sing what you wrote. thats just personal preference tho. i love evrything else about the song. the guitar, the writing, the organization. its on my "having a good day" playlist.

little do you konw, i'm actually a really shitty singer and i'm just starting to not sound absolutely horrid...so i'm okay with it

Mjazk26 · Unread post by **Mjazk26** » Fri Nov 12, 2004 9:37 am

I like it,

mangold · Unread post by **mangold** » Fri Nov 12, 2004 2:29 pm

Matty Boom wrote:
praisedave wrote:
Matty Boom wrote:
praisedave wrote:thats friggon awsome... tab maybe?

edit: i must be honset tho, im not a huge fan of your voice. it sounds good just not my style.
care to be more specific about what you don't like?
about your voice? i think it sounds like you're tryin to hard and it sounds, to me, like your voice doesnt quite have the sustain to sing what you wrote. thats just personal preference tho. i love evrything else about the song. the guitar, the writing, the organization. its on my "having a good day" playlist.
little do you konw, i'm actually a really shitty singer and i'm just starting to not sound absolutely horrid...so i'm okay with it

well congrats on the improvement then

ericwormann · Unread post by **ericwormann** » Fri Nov 12, 2004 2:42 pm

I didn't listen to it, but I bet it sounds like crap.

mangold · Unread post by **mangold** » Fri Nov 12, 2004 2:45 pm

winglet82 wrote:I didn't listen to it, but I bet it sounds like crap.

asshole

Matty Boom · Unread post by **Matty Boom** » Fri Nov 12, 2004 5:32 pm

winglet82 wrote:I didn't listen to it, but I bet it sounds like crap.

kiss kiss, mofo

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an original i wrote today

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