then came autumn

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juineaux
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then came autumn

Unread post by juineaux » Fri Mar 12, 2004 1:35 pm

Heres an old song of mine, but I dont think I ever posted it, and things are dead around here. So tell me what you think-
http://s94451478.onlinehome.us/Misc%20- ... k%2008.mp3

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Unread post by Matty Boom » Fri Mar 12, 2004 2:24 pm

i love your voice tom...it's so chilled

the guitar work is excellent like always

i think i even liked this better than the instrumentals you've put up because you're voice is so mellow, great work
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<a href="http://s93760583.onlinehome.us/platanas.mp3" target="_blank" class="postlink">cause it's a fishpond</a>

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Unread post by juineaux » Fri Mar 12, 2004 2:32 pm

thanks matty,
and heres the lyrics for it:

The evening always smellls like rain, to me anymore
You ask me if I wanna take a walk,
well I would love to talk with you for a little while longer
You said you you want to dedicate some of your sweet time
to someone who love me so but hurt me all the same

You said every God has a face and that's supposed to help me find my own place

Then came autumn to wash these clothes I've been wearing all my life
Then came autumn to say those things I don't really need to hear right now

You never answer my questions, you are always so nervous when you smile
You say things like should a sculpter have to see does a writer have to read,
what does that even matter now to me

You said every God has a face and that's supposed to help me find my own place, where's that it?

Then came autumn to wash these clothes I've been wearing all my life
Then came autumn to say those things I don't really need to hear right now
Then came autumn and I'm just fine, I'm holding on...to you

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Unread post by isaac » Fri Mar 12, 2004 4:35 pm

great work, tom. you know i've been a fan of all your stuff from the beginning. my only problem was that you crammed too much into some lines. when it's not crammed, especially during "then came autumn..", it's perfect. mellow and soothing. consider reworking those rushed lines. it's jarring in comparison to everything else, and it disrupts the flow a little too much. it worked better for fortune cookie rambler, but not in this case. loved the guitar part a lot. great job overall. keep up the great work, tom. you're heading somewhere good.

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juineaux
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Unread post by juineaux » Fri Mar 12, 2004 4:46 pm

thankya :D

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Unread post by juineaux » Fri Mar 12, 2004 5:07 pm

should I keep this song just acoustic and vocals, or should I add something else? I think it needs something more, but I dont know what :?

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Unread post by jwool » Mon Mar 15, 2004 11:09 pm

I wouldnt change a thing. You have a style all your own. Keep the rushed lines...I think it sounds awesome. This idea behind the song ("then came autumn) is money.

Jeff
http://www.jeffwool.com

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Unread post by Matty Boom » Mon Mar 15, 2004 11:28 pm

juineaux wrote:should I keep this song just acoustic and vocals, or should I add something else? I think it needs something more, but I dont know what :?
for every thing you change


i shall kill you
B+P by offer only...thank you

<a href="http://s93760583.onlinehome.us/platanas.mp3" target="_blank" class="postlink">cause it's a fishpond</a>

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