Original: Laye...needing feedback. ~~Updated~~

Post recordings you have made here and get feedback from the community. Songwriting topics would also reside here.

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Taylor614CE
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Original: Laye...needing feedback. ~~Updated~~

Unread post by Taylor614CE » Sun Oct 28, 2007 3:45 pm

Here is the updated version in a higher key

http://www.jukeboxalive.com/audio_play_ ... id=1662717
Last edited by Taylor614CE on Sun Oct 28, 2007 6:44 pm, edited 4 times in total.
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Banjobach
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Unread post by Banjobach » Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:00 pm

I'm not registered in the acoustic guitar forum nor do I want to be. Is there somewhere else you can upload the song so I can hear it?
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Taylor614CE
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sorry

Unread post by Taylor614CE » Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:03 pm

Sorry...I didn't know that it was making people register...

I'll post it somewhere else...any suggestions?
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Taylor614CE
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Fixed

Unread post by Taylor614CE » Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:10 pm

http://www.jukeboxalive.com/audio_play_ ... id=1662717
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Banjobach
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Unread post by Banjobach » Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:36 pm

The ending is the only part I could tell where your voice went flat but other than that it seemed pretty decent. The verses dont seem to communicate as well because of your singing in the low octave. Perhaps keep the first verse in the low octave and sing the others in the same octave as the chorus ("I can see your face" part). I focus too much your singing in a range too low to notice the lyrics. From what I heard it was a love song, which is fine but its not really my cup of tea.
The guitar was simple but luckily you made the song just under 3 minutes so it doesn't have enough time to get boring. The chords are rather "christian acoustic-y" and I kept expecting you to sing about jesus. "Love you always and forever" was a little too cliche for me. I would work on tweaking the guitar chords to make them sound less cookie cutter.
Overall, its pretty good for finishing this morning.
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Taylor614CE
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Unread post by Taylor614CE » Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:53 pm

Thanks for the feedback.

The low octive is b/c I switched from standard to 1/2 step down recently...be trying to adjust my voice for it.
Seems to give me more of a range.
I'll work on the that.
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skilly
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Unread post by skilly » Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:57 pm

i think your have a great voice, and also the potential to write stuff that really bring your voice out.

banjo is right about the christian thing though, it just sounds very chris tomlin to me
-Jake
CoSta wrote:i find chicks with limps sexy. Im not talking like retarded limps but a normal looking chick with a limp with not mental problems is so hot to me
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Taylor614CE
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Thanks.

Unread post by Taylor614CE » Sun Oct 28, 2007 6:00 pm

Thanks I just re-recorded the song with the capo on the 2nd fret (1st standard) and it sounds much better.

I really don't see the christian connection myself, but I suppose when you use cm7 and A in a song...okay I guess I see it.

I am working on a "jam" part for the bridge to mix up the song...haven't found what I am looking for yet.

I'll repost the progess.
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jmoon242
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Unread post by jmoon242 » Sun Oct 28, 2007 11:17 pm

Cool song man....I'm digging it! I don't here the christian rock thing, but i dont' really listen to a whole lot of christian rock to know the difference...I like the lyrics and the guitar is pretty sweet...Thanks for the post
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