original

[Dutch]

This song I wrote today. Its kind of about two friends I had last year that were together and then over the summer things fell apart. the girl found out that the guy was with someone else through facebook for christs sake.

but the recording is real rough, 2nd time i played the song all the way through. ive only been playing harp for about a month, so be kind.

http://wa-01.yousendit.com/transfer.php ... muohio.edu

[mangold]

A pretty decent little progression, the vocals are decent but a little lack luster. put some more behind it.

I will talk mostly about the harp, because i fiddle a bit with that myself. have you taken lessons, cause this is a pretty solid little bit. Also, did you record it seperately or play it with one of those neck holder things? I have a neck holder thing so i can do the ghetto one man band thing, and im trying to get better.

keep it up bud, and keep posting.

[Dutch]

thanks for the input. i haven't taken harp lessons, and i recorded the whole thing in one take with a neck holder.

i know my vox are a little weak. i have a really limited range, but im trying to work on it.

thanks

[Appfro]

i like where you're going, but i don't think you're there yet. by that i mean that there are a lot of weak points in the song that are taking away from it. ie, rhythm. it's all over the place, but it's almost there. it's almost worst to hear rhythm breaks from someone that you can tell has rhythm. if you hear it from someone that you know doesn't have a chance, you just move on to other parts of the song. you have rhythm though, you even show it the further along you get, but the beginning and some other choice parts seem to skip around.

i don't know what to tell you about your voice. you seemed for the most part to be in key. you just seem to talk/sing a bit. so me not being a big fan of your voice would be more more like a preference than something you could fix.

i've never been much of a fan of harmonica solos, especially the slow bluesy kind, but again, preference. most of what you did you did well. i'm just interested in a different genre, so i can't really give you many pointers. stick to what you love though, cause you're doing it fine.

[Dutch]

i like where you're going, but i don't think you're there yet. by that i mean that there are a lot of weak points in the song that are taking away from it. ie, rhythm. it's all over the place, but it's almost there. it's almost worst to hear rhythm breaks from someone that you can tell has rhythm. if you hear it from someone that you know doesn't have a chance, you just move on to other parts of the song. you have rhythm though, you even show it the further along you get, but the beginning and some other choice parts seem to skip around.

i don't know what to tell you about your voice. you seemed for the most part to be in key. you just seem to talk/sing a bit. so me not being a big fan of your voice would be more more like a preference than something you could fix.

i've never been much of a fan of harmonica solos, especially the slow bluesy kind, but again, preference. most of what you did you did well. i'm just interested in a different genre, so i can't really give you many pointers. stick to what you love though, cause you're doing it fine.

thanks for the comments. as far as the rythym goes, i think the problem was that i had really only played the song through once before i recorded it and was still a little uncomfortable with what i was playing. thanks for the input on the voice, i can see what you're talking about with the sing/talk thing and i will try to work that out as i continue to play the song, as i said, only the second time i played it through

thanks