Thanksgiving Freebie Contest **Winner Announced**

[whatshername]

So it's thanks giving at about 2:30 almost time to eat the turkey, It's a big almost 20 pounder cuz there's like 30 people eating. My grandma is getting up there (about 75 years old) and is pretty senial, but she refuses to let anyone else do the cooking. So we're supposed to eat at 3 and everyone is getting there and getting ready to throw down on that turkey...

So my mom was like, go help your grandma take the turkey out of the oven, it should be done... So I'm like, "let me grab that grandma, it's heavy".
So I put on some oven gloves and went to grab the pan and noticed it wasnt hot at all...

So I lift the tin foil off to peek at the turkey and its still raw! I was like "um grandma, I think you forgot to turn on the stove..." I told everyone, wow, we had to wait 2 more hours for turkey oh wow, it was some funny shit. We were all laughing hysterically (including granny) for like 20 minutes.

Needless to say, that was an unforgettable thanksgiving.

this could be a true story..but there's a few things about it that make me feel like it's not. first of all, a turkey that is "almost 20 pounds" will not feed thirty people. my family gets a 22 pounder every year and it feeds fourteen to fifteen of us. secondly, a turkey takes a full day to cook. if you put it in at 9AM it's not ready until like 3PM.

[taylordb]

I am out of town visiting family...so I wll estend the deadline for entries until Sunday evening. Come on people....I know you got some stories out there...lets hear them!!

[2StepGranny]

Well, I wasn't going to reply to this because I couldn't really think of anything, but after today I think I have something that is definitely funny, and disfunctional...

I was with my girlfriend's family for almost all of Thanksgiving, and this weekend. But today I spent the day with my girlfriend's Step Dad's older sisters place, and was a really good time, he is part of a big family and they were all really nice, this was the first time that I've met his family. But there is all kinds of food, I mean DAMN! Turkey, Ham, corn, green bean casserole, I mean the works! So we are in the middle of eatting dinner at one of the dinner tables, and my girlfriend's step dad decides to tell a story about when he was at San Diego, back in his hay day. The story he told came out of nowhere, and this is how he tells it... I'm in San Diego, back when I didn't care about anything, and had a good time, all the time. But I go in for a check up, because I'm having terrible stomach pains, and I don't know what to do. So hostipal, here I come. I go in for my checkup, and the doctor tells me that I have a little block up of gas, or something like that, I wasn't really listening. But he gives me this shot, and tells me that I need to stay here cause I will be having side effects from this shot. He tells me to wait in a room and then when I feel better I can go out the other door, and I can go home. Well I felt pretty good, I didn't know what the doctor was talking about, but I go into the room, and about a minute later and get this really bad pain in my intestenial area, and I seriously fell onto my back, and farted so loudly that it echoed throughout this room twice over... Now the people that were listening was just about the whole table, but his wife, my girlfriend's mother, spits the turkey that she was eatting damn near to my plate across the table. And his sister spits the water she was drinking, into her lap. It was the funniest shit I have ever seen in my life. After everyone gathered themselves, my girlfriend's mother goes, "Honey, how long ago did this happen?" and he says, "Probably 20 years ago or so." To which her reply is, "I can see that you still seem to have this gas problem." And the table starts to crack up again. OMG, the laughter was nonstop.

Now, after we are done eatting, my girlfriend's mother has this Curious George doll that she bought someone for Christmas, but hasn't wrapped it yet, but she likes it too much. So she takes this thing almost everywhere. She is walking around the living room and sits down at a random person and starts making this doll walk all over the persons shoulder and starts talking this weird voice, like we won't think it's her. Then people start asking her if the doll is her's, and she tells everyone that she bought it for a little boy that she knows and is giving it to him for Christmas. And everyone told her that she won't be able to part with it. And she tells everyone that if she can't, then the little boy isn't going to be getting anything from her for Christmas. And she is totally joking, but the face that she made, I don't think I could describe really. It was the most serious face I've ever seen on a person, it was almost "The Look" that all women have.

So between the farting stroy of her Step Dad, and her Mother acting, and playing with a Curious George doll, I think this would have been a fairly normal Thanksgiving dinner, but it wasn't, and it will be something I will never forget. The funniest day I've ever been apart of. So that's my story, hope you enjoy

[Kukini]

So it's thanks giving at about 2:30 almost time to eat the turkey, It's a big almost 20 pounder cuz there's like 30 people eating. My grandma is getting up there (about 75 years old) and is pretty senial, but she refuses to let anyone else do the cooking. So we're supposed to eat at 3 and everyone is getting there and getting ready to throw down on that turkey...

So my mom was like, go help your grandma take the turkey out of the oven, it should be done... So I'm like, "let me grab that grandma, it's heavy".
So I put on some oven gloves and went to grab the pan and noticed it wasnt hot at all...

So I lift the tin foil off to peek at the turkey and its still raw! I was like "um grandma, I think you forgot to turn on the stove..." I told everyone, wow, we had to wait 2 more hours for turkey oh wow, it was some funny shit. We were all laughing hysterically (including granny) for like 20 minutes.

Needless to say, that was an unforgettable thanksgiving.

this could be a true story..but there's a few things about it that make me feel like it's not. first of all, a turkey that is "almost 20 pounds" will not feed thirty people. my family gets a 22 pounder every year and it feeds fourteen to fifteen of us. secondly, a turkey takes a full day to cook. if you put it in at 9AM it's not ready until like 3PM.

k, so maybe my family isnt a bunch of fat asses... joking, but nah, it works, when theres like 10 kids less than 15, we dont need much...

[SpoonInSpoon]

so who won?

[taylordb]

Sorry...I have been busy and have not had a chance to converse with matty about this....it has to be a mutual decision. We'll let you know very soon.
Thanks for your patience!

[Swe dmbfan]

so who won?

it wont be your shit joke,, thats just nasty!
if it would ever happen to me , i wouldn´t tell people for all the DVD´s on matty´s computer...

[SpoonInSpoon]

so who won?

it wont be your shit joke,, thats just nasty!
if it would ever happen to me , i wouldn´t tell people for all the DVD´s on matty´s computer...

shit happens.

[taylordb]

OK......it was a close call between two, but the winner is BADGERDJQ. You will get to pick one dvd each from both matty and my lists.

Now I have to update my list. I will have that done by the end of the weekend.
We will PM you the info and then you can pick...then the dvd's are yours.

Thanks to everyone for posting. I hope you all like these contests as much as I do....its nice to have something other than straight B&P's once and a while.

Anybody got any ideas for some new contests? I'd like to hear some suggestions.

Peace!

[Kukini]

THIS CONTEST WAS FIXED!

Nah, congrats man.

Danny, a good contest would be intellectually challenging, like quizzes and shit, I don't know. Good night! Oh and that Sinclair DVD is great, thanks.

[SpoonInSpoon]

shit happens.

did anyone get that??


so who was it close between?

BADGERDJQ and who else?

[BADGERDJQ]

So....how do I access the show lists?

Thanks again,
Dave