The Official I suck at Dave Songs Thread

skiizalot · Unread post by **skiizalot** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 12:59 am

I wanted to start this as a way for those of you out there that suck at playing Dave songs to be able to sound off about how bad you are. Let me go first.

I suck so bad that Dave would personally kill me if he ever heard me play one note from one of his songs.

I suck so bad that ships within a ten mile radius of me crash into the rocks when I play.

I suck so bad that at least 50 people who know me refuse to ever get into DMB for fear that it will remind them of me playing.

My wife makes me play in a sound proof room and she still nags me about how bad I suck.

billywestom · Unread post by **billywestom** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 1:18 am

lmfao.......how about...

"i suck so bad that the songs themselves are embarassed"

"i suck so bad that even if i ever got good, time would reverse just so i would go back to sucking"

"i suck so bad that the guitar bites me when i try to play it"

"i suck so bad that dave sent me a letter about it - a suicide letter"

I love this, i could go on forever... :lol:

Jay · Unread post by **Jay** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 2:03 am

not me. I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.

8)

as for guitar...well...nevermind.

snoopdoug1 · Unread post by **snoopdoug1** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 7:32 am

Jay wrote:not me. I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.

8)

as for guitar...well...nevermind.

HAHA!

how bout...

I suck so bad if a girl ever heard me play, there's no chance I'll ever bang her.

(Yes, I did steal that from Adam Sandler POS car song)

billywestom · Unread post by **billywestom** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 8:39 am

snoopdoug1 wrote:
Jay wrote:not me. I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.

8)

as for guitar...well...nevermind.
HAHA!

how bout...

I suck so bad if a girl ever heard me play, there's no chance I'll ever bang her.

(Yes, I did steal that from Adam Sandler POS car song)

very nice... :wink:

onemoredrink · Unread post by **onemoredrink** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 9:35 pm

I only know how to play Proudest Monkey, Loving Wings and most of Typical Situation. Anything else is just plain painful. But hey I've only been playing for about 3 months so, i'll give it some time.

cave_cricket · Unread post by **cave_cricket** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 10:18 pm

"I suck so bad that Hoover was jealous...."

Yes it sucked I know....

Pickles · Unread post by **Pickles** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 10:23 pm

how about "i suck so bad that i cant even come up with a clever 'i suck' line to explain how incredibly bad i suck"

ryopan · Unread post by **ryopan** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 10:41 pm

dang, you do suck.

cave_cricket · Unread post by **cave_cricket** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 10:48 pm

how come if you suck or you blow it means the same thing.....aren't sucking and blowing opposites? :lol:

ticohans · Unread post by **ticohans** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 11:23 pm

actually cave, i'm pretty sure that the suck/blow terminology comes from "blow job," in which a good deal of sucking is involved. if one is said to "suck" it implies then that the act of oral sex is somehow belittling to the person performing the act. given the fact that many times men say "suck it" when trying to demean someone, this holds pretty well.

now, that being said, whenever i say "you suck" or the like, i don't think about blow jobs, but i'm pretty sure that oral sex is the root of all that jazz.

(which is an interesting story in and of itself. although the actual derivation of the term "jazz" is unclear, there is a fair amount of evidence that it derives, at least in part, from the term "jism" or "gism," both referring to semen.)

billywestom · Unread post by **billywestom** » Tue Apr 08, 2003 11:32 pm

ticohans wrote:actually cave, i'm pretty sure that the suck/blow terminology comes from "blow job," in which a good deal of sucking is involved. if one is said to "suck" it implies then that the act of oral sex is somehow belittling to the person performing the act. given the fact that many times men say "suck it" when trying to demean someone, this holds pretty well.

now, that being said, whenever i say "you suck" or the like, i don't think about blow jobs, but i'm pretty sure that oral sex is the root of all that jazz.

(which is an interesting story in and of itself. although the actual derivation of the term "jazz" is unclear, there is a fair amount of evidence that it derives, at least in part, from the term "jism" or "gism," both referring to semen.)

what?

ryopan · Unread post by **ryopan** » Wed Apr 09, 2003 12:00 am

jazz IS pretty close to jizz. when i say i suck, i mean im not good at something. now, the real question is what is a blow job? :?:

ryopan · Unread post by **ryopan** » Wed Apr 09, 2003 12:44 am

LOL & jk. i was hoping someone would think i was serious and go through the basics of it. lame. i su.......stink.

ticohans · Unread post by **ticohans** » Wed Apr 09, 2003 1:03 am

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The Official I suck at Dave Songs Thread

The Official I suck at Dave Songs Thread

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